


Take on me

by EctoHoltzmann, ForxGood



Series: Means and Ends and Lipstick Stains [1]
Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: Age Swap, As in Erin and Abby are younger than Holtzmann in this fic, F/F, blonde!Erin, escort AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 12:45:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10163315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EctoHoltzmann/pseuds/EctoHoltzmann, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForxGood/pseuds/ForxGood
Summary: After Ghosts from our Past got published, Erin's parents unceremoniously disowned her, having had more than enough of their daughter's 'ghost' obsession. Having already cut all ties with Abby, Erin was left on her own, with only an acceptance to a particle physics grad programme at Princeton to her name. While she works to get her PhD there, she ends up working for a high-class escort service run by Jennifer Lynch in order to afford tuition. But when Jennifer sends her on a very specific job, she gets a little more than she bargained for.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This AU was born from a need for a blonde!Erin verse on my RP blog (scientificxmethod). For reference, Erin probably looks a lot like Kwiig as Kelly Campbell in Masterminds. Again, thanks to EctoHoltzmann, without whom this would not have existed.

Erin smoothed out the skirt of her dress one last time, trying to control the nerves she felt about taking this job. It had been a while since she’d been  _this_  nervous, this anxious to not mess up. She’d built up a routine by now; making pleasant conversation with the clients, behaving like the perfect date every step of the way, and then calling Jennifer with a quick update report when she was on her way home. But with the client being a friend of her boss, this was slightly more complicated.

She knew the brunette trusted her - Jennifer had helped her quite a bit in the beginning, making sure she was comfortable with the job - but she also knew she cared for the friends she had. And Erin was sure that if she messed up, if she left a bad impression on this woman, that Jennifer wouldn’t hesitate to fire her. And Erin couldn’t have that. She’d built up a decent reserve over the past year, but there were very few jobs out there that both paid enough to keep a roof over her head  _and_  could be combined with the crazy schedule of her grad programme. If she lost this job, she was pretty royally fucked.

So here she was, as a favour to Jennifer, hoping to  _god_  her friend wasn’t a vengeful person out to ruin Erin’s life for no good reason whatsoever. Of course the brunette had told her her friend checked out (“She’s a good person, Erin, but if she doesn’t get laid soon I’m going to murder her”), but Erin was nervous nonetheless. Probably part of the anxiety issues she’d never truly been able to shake.

Still, she was a professional,  _dammit_. She couldn’t run and refuse to do this just because she was nervous about it; she  _owed_  Jenn. And she was probably just being paranoid anyway. Odds were this was just going to be a job like any other, and Erin wouldn’t have to see this person again, and she could sleep better at night knowing she was just a little less indebted to Jennifer (even though the brunette always insisted that Erin had  _nothing_  to pay her back for. But Erin had never liked being dependent on other people).

At least she’d known she was at the right address, having run into her friend-slash-boss in the hallway on her way up. The brunette had pointed her to the right door, with an oddly amused look in her eyes. Erin had decided to ignore that, having other things to worry about anyway. Knocking on the door to the apartment, she tried her hardest not to fidget too much as a voice sounded on the other end of the door.

“Jenn I swear to god if you’re jerking me around I’m going to populate your office with voles-… Oh, excuse me.”

When the door swung open, Erin had to try her hardest not to stare too much. Much to Erin’s dismay, Jennifer had conveniently forgotten to mention that her friend was absolutely drop-dead gorgeous.

(And yes, now it made sense why Jenn had looked as amused as she had. She knew Erin had a type. Damn her.)

But there was something more pressing to worry about, with a sudden realization making Erin freeze on the spot. _Oh god, Jenn hadn’t told her friend Erin was coming, had she?_ This was going to be awkward at best, disastrous at worst. For both parties involved, possibly, which had Erin stressing over her job all over again. She still had 2 more years go to before she could get her PhD, she  _needed_  the money.

“Knowing Jenn she might actually consider keeping those around as pets.” Erin shot the blonde a nervous smile, trying her hardest to ignore how her heart was racing in her chest.

Jennifer’s friend raised a brow at that, a little amazed – and, dare Erin hope it, _impressed_ – by Erin’s presence. “Can I help you?”

Erin tried to ignore her nerves as she smiled at the other woman; who, Erin was pretty sure by now, was slowly catching on to who - or what - Erin was, and why she was here. 

“Judging by the look on your face I’m going to suggest going with grasshoppers if you want to get her back for this. But you didn’t hear that from me; I’m not really looking forward to her firing me.”

And that’s when Erin could see the pieces click into place, just as the sound of the stairwell doors closing marked Jennifer’s exit from the situation. Holtzmann had to admit it was a clever move, finally understanding why Jennifer had been so adamant on her dressing up to ‘go out’ and then cancelling on her at the very last minute. It wouldn’t be the first time the dark haired woman had done this to her.

She rested against the doorframe, arms crossed and a soft smile on her lips. She was beautiful – very beautiful, in fact - the engineer had to give her that. “One question. Is this a favor for Jennifer or did she pay you?” She reached into her pocket, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and lighting one for herself before offering it to her visitor. The young blonde’s answer would set the pace for the whole night. “Please answer honestly. I can tell if you’re lying, I teach.”

Erin glanced down at the cigarette, before shaking her head. “A bit of both?” She answered, her tone still nervous. “I mean, I do still have rent I need to pay…” And god, what kind of an impression was she making here now, anyway? “But I also owe Jenn quite a few favours by now. Kind of a long story.” And definitely not one she wanted to get into completely sober. Or with a client. Or a stranger. Or…

Well, just in general, maybe.

Looking at the other woman - and  _fuck Jennifer Lynch, fuck her_ , because she was  _exactly_  Erin’s type - she shifted in her heels, looking a little apologetic. “Look, I can get out of your hair if you want? I’m not really in the business of staying around if you’re uncomfortable with this, and I doubt Jenn would mind. Though if I may offer some advice, she did mention she’d probably murder if she, and I quote, ‘has to put up with this gay disaster that is my friend much longer’. So…” Erin shrugged lightly.

Holtzmann just opened the door to Erin in response, the confirmation that the girl was indeed being paid being a comforting one. It meant this was business, legal as could be. “Then come on in.”

Erin had to admit to being just a little relieved the woman hadn’t just sent her away. She didn’t seem like the type of person to cause her to lose her job for whatever reason, but it did put her more at ease as she followed her inside, carefully shutting the door behind her as Holtzmann walked over to her small bar, fixing them both a drink. The engineer wasn’t sure what the girl would want, but figured something fruity would suffice.

“I’m Jillian Holtzmann by the way, and I’m 100 percent jazzed to meet you. Make yourself cozy Miss…”

“Erin.” She introduced herself, always making sure to omit her last name in case someone decided to do a google search. She wasn’t the only ‘Erin’ around here, and certainly not the most famous one, but she didn’t really feel like risking people showing up and blowing her cover in front of her colleagues in academia. “Nice to meet you, Jillian.”

Holtzmann smiled at her as she handed Erin a drink, not bothering to correct the girl on the use of her first name. It was true most people just called her ‘Holtz’, but there was something about the way her name fell from those lips. The engineer could tell there was an amazing mind hiding behind the blue eyes, and she had a feeling Jennifer had known Erin was very much her type when she set up this little scheme.

She put out her cigarette, taking a drink of her gin and tonic before settling on the leather couch. “Also, paid or not, I’m not in the business of making you do anything you don’t want to.”

“I wouldn’t have let you, either.” Erin shrugged, taking a sip of her drink, which made Holtzmann chuckle a little. She studied the younger woman for a moment, taking in the small details. She was nervous, but confident to a point.

An interesting data point, to be sure.

Sitting down on the couch next to Holtzmann, Erin shot her a genuine smile, the young blonde having to admit Jillian didn’t seem like the type to overstep lines, anyway. “So, how do you know Jennifer?” She asked, deciding pleasant conversation was probably the best way forward here.

“We dated, once upon a time.” Holtzmann smiled over her drink and rested with her arm at the back of the couch. Giving Erin a kind smile, she decided to flirt a little bit. “Fun fact, she used to do sketch comedy with me.

“Really now?” Erin asked, a grin playing on her lips. “She never mentioned that to me, and I’ve known her for a while now.” Erin would even go as far as to consider Jennifer a friend, what with the way she treated her.

“Funny woman when she wants to be.” Holtzmann grinned in response. “What about you, how does a pretty woman such as yourself start working for her?”

Erin shrugged lightly, taking another sip of her drink to buy herself some time to get her story straight, making sure she didn’t let too many details slip about her regular life. As much as she liked the blonde - and she did, she really did, and she somehow suspected that was exactly why Jennifer had chosen  _her_ , because she knew just how much the brunette loved to meddle - she made quite a serious rule of keeping her personal life personal. She simply had too much to lose if it ever came to light that she, Erin Gilbert, ‘rising star’ in the world of particle physics, worked as an escort.

“She spotted me about a year and a half ago, when I was out trying to apply for 5 different jobs at once.” She began slowly, trying to think about how much to reveal. “I was seriously strapped for cash, and I think she realized just as well as I did that that wasn’t going to work out all that well. So she offered me a chance to make that kind of money in a less time-consuming way, and… I took it. The rest, as they say, is history.”

Holtzmann smirked and tipped her drink in a gesture of acknowledgment, taking a sip before continuing. There was a lot about her own past that she wasn’t proud of, but she would share nonetheless. There was a connection here that she was interested in exploring, even if this was Jennifer’s handiwork.

“I did porn in college. Not a lot, but enough to fund my remaining bills. You can look it up sometime if you’re brave.” She smirked again, shooting Erin a wink as they conversed. She wasn’t at all ashamed by it – hell, she’d had fun while she did it - but it was still a less than perfect scenario of the past. She could see Erin smiling at that, the fact that Holtzmann wasn’t judging her for her job certainly helping to put the younger woman at ease.

“Well… I just might, at some point.” Erin grinned, taking another sip of her drink, belatedly realizing it probably wasn’t the best idea to be flirting with a client. Even if Erin was suspecting more and more that this had been set up by Jennifer with the purpose of match-making. _And successfully so_ , Erin assumed, as she truly found Jillian quite captivating. And  _damn_ , she was going to kill Jennifer for that later, especially because it seemed the other woman was equally taken with her in return, which was bad because of a  _lot_  of reasons, and Erin did not want to get into that right now.

Instead, she just shrugged, feeling a little more comfortable in the conversation. “Same concept, different execution. Financial aid only covers so much, education is expensive… Jennifer has really been a tremendous help, though. She was always willing to throw a few more jobs in my direction if I was having tough months. Which was a  _lot_ , in the beginning.” To say her financial situation had been a disaster was an understatement. She had come awfully close to being forced to spend time on Jennifer’s couch a few times, almost getting kicked out because she couldn’t swing the rent. But things had slowly gotten better after a while, and by now she’d gotten to a reasonably financially secure place.

“We all have a past, I’m not going to judge anyone for it.” Holtzmann decided to bridge the gap between them, offering Erin the engineer’s hand to hold if she desired. If she was honest, Holtzmann wanted to kiss her, finding her attractive and lovely, but she opted against it. She’d ask her politely rather than act. “Also… I find you very beautiful and would love to kiss you… But I figure it’s best to let you set pace. Thought I would get my feelings out there in the air.”

Erin almost instinctively felt herself reach over to take the blonde’s hand in her own as she spoke, for reasons she couldn’t quite understand. Or possibly didn’t _want_ to understand. Holtzmann shifted slightly, watching the younger woman with great interest, but refraining from making another move. She wanted Erin to be comfortable around her, and that meant not pushing her too much.

Even if the young woman was blushing rather prettily at her as she spoke.

“The feeling is definitely mutual.” Erin replied hesitantly, looking over to smile at Holtzmann. The engineer was only a little disappointed when Erin almost immediately turned the conversation back to ‘safer’ topics. “What did you study?”

“Theoretical particle physics, I’m an engineer. I have a doctorate from MIT. Nearly worked for CERN for a hot minute.” She left out the part about locking a man in a particle accelerator, figuring Erin didn’t need to know that. “What about you, if I may ask?” There was no pressure in her voice, Holtzmann just wanting to know more about this woman stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Erin didn’t answer, instead letting out an annoyed noise. Because of course,  _of course_  Jillian Holtzmann would not only be incredibly kind and drop-dead gorgeous, she just also  _had_  to be a genius engineer with a doctorate in her field of study. If Erin had still had any doubts about this being a set-up, this piece of information would have dispelled them all.

“God, I hate Jennifer.” The words had fallen from her lips before Erin had been able to stop herself. Realizing her mistake, she blushed again, trying to figure out the best way to talk herself out of this situation. “I mean… That’s impressive. Ridiculously impressive. And also making you even more ridiculously attractive which is kind of problematic for a number of reasons- And I should probably shut up now, shouldn’t I?”

“No. I like your voice. And yes, she’s evil for doing this to us.” The engineer smiled and turned herself to better face the younger woman, loving how flustered she was getting. Her eyes fell to their joined hands and she let her thumb trace patterns along Erin’s skin there. She mused at the feeling, enjoying something so simple. “And as long as you’re not complimenting me as part of your job, I think I’m good.”

Erin felt herself blush again - and god, she had never blushed this much in the presence of  _anyone_ , this was truly getting ridiculous now - and quickly shook her head. “No, no, not at all. I’m honestly just stupidly attracted to intelligent people. And I mean;  _CERN_. A doctorate in  _particle physics_. Add that to everything else and I’m pretty sure Jennifer found the textbook definition of ‘my type’ and ran with it.”

Erin  _did_  actually groan this time, placing her empty glass on the table to run a hand through her hair in annoyance. “I think I may actually have to kill her for this. ‘No falling for clients’ is pretty much rule number 1 through 5 in her book. In all caps, bold, and underlined three times.”

Realizing what she’d just said, Erin closed her eyes in a frustrated sigh. Great, she’d basically just told Jillian she was falling for her. Hard. She was honest to god making quite the mess of this evening, probably.

Holtzmann filed away the other woman’s statement for the time being, letting it slide, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable in the slightest. She realized Erin probably hadn’t meant to voice those specific thoughts out loud, but she couldn’t deny it didn’t make her feel surprisingly good.

“Would you… Like another drink or perhaps something to eat?” The engineer was soft with her voice, tilting her head slightly. Holtzmann wanted to be closer to her, for reasons she didn’t understand. Opening her eyes to look at the blonde again, Erin couldn’t help but smile at her ever so slightly, nodding. “I think another drink may not be the worst idea right now.”

Holtzmann simply squeezed Erin’s hand and stood, heading back to her bar to make her another drink. This woman was utterly intriguing and Holtzmann felt herself wanting to know everything. “I hope you don’t mind me saying, but you are breath-taking.” The words came out far smoother than she intended but she said then nonetheless. “And you are a good woman, I can tell that much.”

Erin just felt herself getting more and more flustered at Jillian’s compliments, even if she missed the contact and their proximity from the moment the engineer had let go of her hand. The other woman seemed to really like her (for a reason that completely eluded Erin), and Erin had to admit to being unused to this level of genuine positive attention.

“I bet you say that to all the girls you’re going to be sleeping with.” She countered jokingly, before realization hit and she decided that oh yes, she  _was_  going to murder Jennifer Lynch for this. Did she really, honestly expect Erin to treat this person just like any other client from hereon out? Undoubtedly, if she knew anything about Jennifer’s ways of meddling and matchmaking, the sex was going to be absolutely mindblowing, and Erin was going to get even more invested than she already was. And what with Jennifer’s rules on dating clients, that might become a problem.

At this rate, she’d actually have to quit, and she simply could  _not_  do that.

Much to her surprise, however, Holtzmann shook her head. “I don’t intend on sleeping with you unless you want me to. I’m not that kind of person, not when this isn’t truly a business meeting for you. If it is, then by all means; I’ll take you into the bedroom and rock your world. But if you want me for me… then no.” She smiled kindly and took a sip of Erin’s drink, handing it back to her before adjusting her yellow lenses.

Erin wasn’t sure how pleased she was with that answer. On the one hand, it meant not breaking Jennifer’s rules and in a way even opened up the potential of turning this into an actual relationship. On the other hand, she  _really_  wouldn’t have minded sleeping with Jillian. (In general, that is. Not under these circumstances, but in general.)

Still, she smiled gratefully at the other blonde, taking the drink from her. “I do. Want you for you, I mean.” Erin replied, feeling a rush of butterflies in her stomach as she looked at Holtzmann. Which, again, was problematic. Because she couldn’t honestly hope to date a friend of Jennifer’s, could she? After Jennifer had all but positioned the blonde as a client? No, she  _had_  to stop falling for Jillian Holtzmann.

But that was honestly becoming more and more difficult by the second, as Holtzmann laced her fingers with Erin’s, lifting her hand to press a kiss to the back of it, grinning as Erin’s blush returned with a vengeance. Because good lord, Erin was a sucker for such stupidly chivalrous and romantic gestures, and who the hell did Jillian Holtzmann think she was anyway? The woman of Erin’s dreams?

“Ah, so you do want me as something other than a supposed client. I like that idea.” Holtzmann could almost laugh at this situation, finding humor in almost everything. Jennifer had really done it this time, especially if Erin’s reaction was anything to go by.

“Are you kidding?” Erin exclaimed, “If Jennifer didn’t have those rules in place I probably would have jumped you as soon as you mentioned you have a doctorate in particle physics.” And okay, she probably had to stop with the alcohol, because she always began spilling secrets when she was even a little tipsy. And until she had cleared it all with Jennifer, she couldn’t really let Jillian know much about herself. If, for whatever reason, Jillian  _did_  decide to spread her secret, Erin’s future as a respected scientist was pretty much doomed.

“Oh, I am well aware of her rules.” Holtzmann laughed. “I helped her out for a while when she first started. Not in the same way as you, but close.”

“Just out of curiosity…” Erin asked, never having taken her eyes off Jillian. “Has she tried to set you up with one of her employees before?”

Holtzmanne pondered the question for a moment, actually thinking it over before coming to her conclusion. The engineer had helped Jennifer with a lot over the years, but this was a new thing. “Actually no, this is a first for me.”

She sat back down, another drink for herself in her hand. Jennifer had never done anything like this before, but Holtzmann understood where the brunette was coming from. She cared about this girl on some level, maybe even as a friend if she was willing to try and sway her out of the field. Not that Holtzmann would complain, but she understood the industry and the need for it from both sides. 

“This is proving to be an interesting birthday.”

Erin nearly did a spit-take at that, because what the  _fuck_  kind of a sick joke did Jennifer think she was playing here anyway? “It’s your birthday?” Erin asked, carefully placing her drink on the table as she looked at Holtzmann with wide eyes. “She  _seriously_  tried to set you up with me on your  _birthday_?”

“It appears that way.” The engineer chuckled a little, taking a long drink of the alcohol in her hand before reaching out with her other and offering it to Erin once more. She liked this woman, a lot, and she wasn’t sure how to handle that thought… especially given the circumstances.

“Well then…” Erin let out a sigh, feeling herself smile almost reflexively when she felt Jillian’s hand on her own again. “Happy birthday, in any case.” She shot the engineer an apologetic smile, undoubtedly feeling a little bad that this night wasn’t about to go as Holtzmann might have hoped. Not that the engineer cared about that all that much.

“Don’t worry. This is enough of a gift for me, Er-Bear.” She smirked and winked at the younger woman, wondering where this was going to go next. Yes, she definitely wanted to get laid, but not as a client. If she wanted to see Erin again outside of her job, then she couldn’t be seen as a client by her, not even once. “Question. When are you off the clock?”

“I was sent here pretty much specifically with the instructions to ‘please for the love of all that’s holy, sacrificial, and divine get you laid, because she cannot deal with your gay disaster mode much longer’. So, you know…” Erin looked incredibly apologetic at that. “Her words, not mine.”

Holtzmann laughed, loudly, at Jennifer’s quote. Wiping her face as a single tear left her from the hilarity of it all. “Really?! I’m not THAT bad.” She leaned back against the couch and chuckled to herself as she took another swig. “I’m gonna put sooooooo many creepy crawlies in her office.”

Erin merely giggled at the blonde’s reaction, shaking her head at how offended she sounded. “I don’t know, Jillian.” Erin teased with a grin. “I’ve known Jenn for a while now, and she tends to be brutally honest about such matters.” And again, here she was, flirting with a client. But this was all Jennifer’s own fault anyway, the brunette couldn’t honestly have expected her to remain professional during all this. Especially when the attraction between them was so clearly mutual.

Holtzmann ruffled her blonde hair, taking her glasses off to set them on the coffee table. The engineer would plot her revenge later and she shot a glance over at Erin.  She smiled a little mischievously before finishing around in her back pocket for something. Jennifer had planned this extraordinarily well, covering every base, and it a way it made her head spin from amazement.

“Welp, she wanted me to give you this.” She handed Erin a small card and laughed a little to herself. “She really did mean to set us up. I thought she was just being a dick, but whoops… I was wrong, Hot Stuff.”

Frowning, Erin took the card from her, flipping it over in her hands to spot Jennifer’s signature classy scrawl.

 _Free Pass_.

“I assume she meant this for you, if you wanted it.”

“Well, you can’t say she doesn’t know me well…” Erin replied slowly, staring at the card in her hands as she debated what to do. On the one hand, she could take it, essentially damning all of Jennifer’s rules to hell and probably have one of the best nights of her life. On the other hand, as far as Erin knew, a ‘Free pass’ only counted for one event. And if this was just Jennifer hoping to get her friend laid, using Erin to do so because fuck it if Jillian Holtzmann wasn’t her type to a T and Jennifer  _knew_  this… Well, Erin wasn’t going to be able to be okay with that. Forgetting about Jillian was going to prove difficult enough as it was should it be necessary, she couldn’t also risk the enigmatic blonde setting the bar for good sex too high for any future partners.

Looking from Holtzmann to the card and back, Erin sighed, before handing it back. “As much as I want to take that - and I do, I  _really_  do - I’m pretty sure I’m not going to want this to be a one time thing. And I’m still a little on the verge about the ethics of all this. I mean, Jennifer is a friend, yes, but she’s also legally my boss. So… While I really,  _really_  want to say yes, I’m going to get even more emotionally invested if I do, so maybe it’s better if I don’t.”

A silence fell between them after Erin spoke those words, the young woman holding out the card to Holtzmann. Holtzmann looked down at the card, letting the words sink in… before she smiled.

“Then it’s settled darling.” The older blonde looked down at the card once more, before taking it and ripping it in half. It had been the answer she wanted, she realized, now that those words were out in the open. Because she liked Erin. Really, _really_ liked her. Even though this could be complicated, she wasn’t about to let it be so. The engineer chewed on her lower lip for a moment before watching the other woman. She was so kind and sincere, not deserving of this life, but she understood its purpose. It was a means to an end for the younger woman, and that was something to be respected.

Holtzmann chuckled a little once again, Jennifer was going to yell at her for not actually having birthday sex. She’d have to remind herself to give the damn woman a call and yell at her for a minute… and probably get yelled at.

She rolled her head to look over at Erin, squeezing her hand softly, a gesture which made Erin smile in return. With how much she liked Holtzmann, she was more than a little glad the engineer seemed to understand the ethical dilemma this was posing for her.

“I’m glad you and I agree.” Holtzmann continued, as she downed her drink, realizing she was going to need the courage for what she wanted to ask next. Erin made sure to listen attentively as she spoke, her own drink forgotten on the table as she looked at the blonde. 

“So, I know what I want for my birthday gift.” Holtzmann began. “Two things. One, a kiss. Two, to see you again… off the clock. If that’s alright by you.” Her blue eyes fell, not really wanting to look at the other woman as she was most likely about to be rejected… but she had to admit that regardless, this had been an interesting night.

“It’s definitely alright by me.” Erin smiled at her, intertwining their fingers again. “But I do kind of have to consider Jennifer’s position in all this. Just from an ethical standpoint… I kind of need her not to hate me. I know she set us up and probably expected for this to happen, but I don’t want to just assume…” Again, her eyes were apologetic as she spoke, Erin really just wanting to say ‘yes’ and maybe even plan a date for tomorrow. As the situation was, though, she probably had some serious talking to do first. “A kiss I can do, though.” She smiled, hoping to meet Jillian’s gaze as she lightly squeezed her hand again.

The engineer’s blue eyes flicked up to meet Erin’s as she spoke, and a quiet smile crossed the engineer’s features. “She and I are very good friends. I’ll call her.” Holtzmann shifted enough to face the other woman. If kissing is all they could share in good conscious, then she was determined to make it breath-taking.

She reached out, her hand threading slightly through Erin’s hair and cupping her jaw for a moment, the gesture making Erin’s breath hitch in her throat, before Holtzmann pulled her in for a kiss. It was slow and languid and she pulled the younger woman close, Erin responding in kind as she wrapped her arm around the woman’s neck, allowing Holtzmann to pull her down on top of her. Which,  _shit_ , just felt so amazing and so right that Erin once again had to give props to Jennifer’s brilliant mind for setting this up. Had she been a weaker woman, Erin surely would have caved and ended up fucking Jillian absolutely senseless.

“Don’t worry… nothing goes past this.” The engineer murmured against Erin’s lips, which made Erin chuckle in response. By god, Holtzmann wanted to have her way with this woman on top of her, but she couldn’t and wouldn’t until she knew they could actually be in a situation other than one that was paid for. She wanted Erin to be her  _person…_ not her  **whore**.

(And fuck, she hated that word.  **Hated it.** Erin was more than that, and she fucking knew it. She could see it in her eyes… and she was going to remind this wonderful girl that she was worth  _everything_.)

“It’s kind of ridiculous how much self-control I’m exerting now.” Erin mumbled in between kisses, her hands having found their way to the engineer’s hair. “Because I really,  _really_  want to go past this, but there’s just so many reasons that that is a bad idea.”

The kiss deepened and Holtzmann rubbed Erin’s back lightly, breaking the kiss only for much needed air and hushed words. “Not tonight, baby… but some other time.” She didn’t like turning the beautiful woman down, but she knew the rules, intimately… and she knew what she could get away with. Kissing Erin was a close as she would get tonight.

“God, I hope that’s a promise.” Erin murmured, capturing Holtzmann’s lips in another kiss. And really, if they were going to keep this up Erin seriously wondered how long she’d be able to keep her hands to herself. Because while she usually hated pet names, the way they fell from Jillian’s lips made her feel absolutely amazing. And with Jillian’s hands resting at her waist, and Erin herself lying on top of her…

Yes, she could feel her resolve to keep things PG beginning to falter.

Holtzmann looked up at the younger woman, her hands now resting on Erin’s hips as they relaxed together on the couch. “Also… I’m falling pretty hard too, babydoll” She smiled, recalling the words Erin had uttered earlier that night. “So don’t think you’re the only one on this boat.”

Meeting Holtzmann’s gaze, Erin felt herself smiling at the older woman again, a response which had pretty much become reflexive by now. “That’s sweet.” She said, sounding completely genuine (albeit a little disbelieving). “You’re sweet.”

“So are you… and we should stop.” Holtzmann sat up slightly, using her elbows as support as she looked down at Erin, half picturing what it would be like to see her in other positions… but she shook those thoughts from her mind as she pressed another light kiss to her lips. “Let’s keep this… within the rules… and I’ll see you again, baby.” She lifted a hand, gently threading it through Erin’s hair, playing with the strands as she pressed a second kiss to her forehead. 

Erin hummed in agreement, though not really making a move to pull away for another minute or so, enjoying the sensation of kissing Jillian way too much. When she finally did pull away, she was pouting just a little, even as she felt the engineer’s lips brush against her own again. She was going to make Jennifer pay for this somehow. Because really, this was just cruel, dangling this absolute dream of a woman in front of Erin like that.

Still, she nodded, untangling her own hands from Jillian’s hair and resting them on the blonde’s shoulders instead. “I never thought I’d hear myself complaining about rules, but here I am.” She chuckled, stealing another kiss from Holtzmann’s lips with a small smile. “And I really hope that’s true.”

Realizing that if she didn’t pull away now, she was going to keep kissing Holtzmann, and then she was really going to end up breaking every single one of her rules, Erin carefully got up from the couch. “I should probably go, then. Because I’m pretty sure I’m not going to be able to keep my hands to myself if I don’t.”

Holtzmann really didn’t want the other woman to leave, but she knew it had to be that way. The engineer stood slowly, handing her her purse back as she gathered her things slowly. Neither of them wanted this separation, and she made a mental note to call Jennifer the moment the younger woman left.

“Hopefully I’ll see you soon. I’m not allowed to give you my number and you can’t give me yours. Rules and all… but I’ll call Jennifer, tell her it’s cool if you want my digits. And I’ll let her know that I’m not a client.”

“I’m familiar with the rules.” Erin nodded. “Usually I’m quite keen on them.” But that had been  _before_  Jennifer had apparently taken a peek at Erin’s dream journal and had then presented Erin’s dream woman to her as a fucking  _client_. She was going to give Jennifer an earful about this.

… At least. she would as soon as she had gotten a grip on this herself. Because when Holtzmann kissed her again, the butterflies in her stomach were unmistakable, and was it  _really_  the best idea to fall for someone right now? When she had only barely begun getting her life on track again? She was a disowned grad student working as an escort whose usual dress code was a lot more conservative than this. She wasn’t exactly a catch. But she let her Jillian kiss her anyway, responding quite happily in turn. Because even if this wouldn’t go anywhere, if Jennifer wasn’t okay with this or if Jillian changed her mind, Erin had already fallen. She might as well take whatever little she could get. Which was exactly why she was smiling when they broke away, looking like she was in quite the blissful daze as she looked at the engineer. 

“I hope so too.” She admitted, still smiling at her. 

Holtzmann shot the younger woman a lop-sided smile, reaching out one last time to press a kiss to her lips - just in case she never got the chance again – before visibly stopping herself. She wanted nothing more than to void the agreement and pull her straight to bed, but no… she wanted something more than sex. Clearing her throat, Holtzmann laughed. “Gonna have to stop myself before we back ourselves into  _no date zone_. But thank you, for the present. It was perfect.” She shot the younger woman a wink.

Erin laughed at that, completely having leaned in a few inches herself. Clearly, this self-control thing was working out great for them, and despite her worries about the long-run potential of this, she found the current situation quite amusing. “I should probably go, then.” She grinned, still looking at Holtzmann like she was completely smitten with the other woman.

“I’ll see you around, bright eyes.” Holtzmann nodded. “And thank you for the birthday present.”

“You’re welcome. Happy birthday, Jillian… I’ll call you.”

“I certainly hope you do, bright eyes.”

Shooting Jillian one last smile and a quick wave, Erin left the apartment, leaning against the door as soon as it closed behind her, trying to compose herself. Because  _hell_ , this could be more than a little problematic. This  _would_  be more than a little problematic. Jenn was going to get an earful later. And with that, she swung her bag higher over her shoulder and made her way home, Holtzmann watching her go before closing the door behind the younger woman, letting out a breath she hadn’t known she had been holding as she listened to the fading echo of Erin’s heels down the hall.

She took a moment, walking over to the bar and making herself another drink, sipping on it. Holtzmann was already trying to commit all those kisses to memory as she stared at NYC outside of the window of her apartment. The engineer fished around in her pocket and pulled out her phone, swiping her finger across the screen and pulling up a contact to dial. She waited for a moment, letting it ring and sighing as she waited for Jennifer to pick up.

Finally, there was a click. 

“Hello?”

“She didn’t use the free pass.” Holtzmann smiled as the words left her lips.

“I KNEW IT!”

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, this is part of a series. There is more. But I'm SWAMPED with uni work and editing work for both 'X marks the spot' and 'Treat You Better', so it may take a while to post. You can follow updates via my personal twitter (Forxgood) come say hi!


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